Friends of Virginia W

john smiling his dang fool head off
Maybe I’m really this happy, maybe not, but hey we’re all in this together…

We hear time and again that this is “a hard time of year” for people, but it can be hard to recognize when somebody near us is struggling with things–or, sometimes, when we are ourselves. Often it’s difficult enough to discuss our troubles with the people in our lives, and this is complicated further by circumstances such as needing to live up to making this is “the most wonderful time of the year,” as the song goes. Sometimes all it takes is having a conversation with somebody outside our direct circle to help get things off our chest and put things in perspective. A place to start might be http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/. If that site doesn’t look good check out http://www.samhsa.gov/samhsanewsletter/Volume_18_Number_5/ResourcesAtAGlance.aspx.

So now for some free samples, a little reading and a little music. Here’s a piece from the beginning of my poetry collection SuiPsalms

Friends of Virginia W

My name is John and I’m a failure
addict. If you put it
in front of me I will
pop it, smoke it, eat it, drink
it with no questions or
hesitation. If it moves
I will stick myself into
it, without reservation or
invitation. If my future
or my family depend on it I will
abstain; discretion is the worst
part of failure.

Too many of you also know what
it means to be afflicted
with the wrong people at too
early an age: the ones who
drag you into their own
vices by demonstration, by
coercion…the ones who
cultivate the splintered
bonsai of your heart, pruning
away inhibition, composting
reason. The ones who plant
their seed of shame in your
eyes, staining everything
with the tint of
your own pain.

I am the incomplete abortion
of too many schemers, an
orgy of thieves. Today is
my first day but it
feels like it will
be my last.

Today always will
and always has.

So I’m praying for the strength
that should have been lent
by elders in my youth, when
instead they invested their
weakness in me. I pray for
the strength to repay both
the principal and the interest,
and the wisdom not to…but:

My name is John.
And
I’m a failure addict.

* * *

If you’ve made it this far you deserve a free song. Here’s “Koala Bear Pimp” from the Colors Made of Tears soundtrack. Listen free at https://bizarrowriter.wordpress.com/?attachment_id=1651.

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